Sunday, March 28, 2004

Why buy the cow when the milk is free?

Lately, people have been pressuring me about my realtionship with D. I love him, he loves me (I'm sure),but he has yet to show the slightest inkling of wanting to make a long term commitment. I don't know what to do anymore. I can't find the words to fully convey how hurt I feel; I've run out of things to say.

I tell him all the time how much I love him and want us to be together for the long haul;I've even proposed on several occassions. At this point, I'm really beginning to think that I'm in a relationship which will be forever be in a state of perpetual limbo;never getting better, never getting worse...just being there.

There comes a point in life in which you come to the realization that no matter how much you want your life to go a certain way,things never go the way you want them to. Maybe it's my fault for sticking with him for what's about to be six years and thinking that someday he'll realize how great I am and he'll fall on his knee and pop the question.

Shame on me for being a big softie.

All I want is for someone to want to be with me forever and not just because they feel it's comfortable to be in a relationship with me. I want a man who'll be willing to accept me,crazy opinions, flaws and all.

The main problem I see right now is that on D.'s list of priorities, I'm really low on the totem pole (somewhere between finishing college and paying off his car). It's not like I even want to be center of his universe, just a planet in his galaxy,a star in his sky.

Thursday, March 25, 2004

My name is Tamara, and I'm addicted to Walmart

I know what you're saying, how can I possibly be addicted to Walmart? Well, intially, I didn't suffer form what I like to call "Walmart-itis" but slowly, I begin to become addicted to going there. I mean, where else can you go and find clothes, cds, crochet supplies and do grocery shopping all at the same place!

The other reason why I like Walmart so much stems from the creation of Super Walmart. At regular Walmart, or as I like to call it, Walmart Lite, you can only buy clothes,furniture, other things but, there is no grocery area, so you still have to go somewhere else to get food. With Super Walmart however, you can get pretty much whatever you need at a lower price than other places.

Since they have put a Super Walmart in my neighborhood, people have been there non-stop which annoys me somewhat but is still good because this means that business is booming. I especially take comfort in knowing that whenever I finish shopping, I don't have to wait in line becuase there is a cashier waiting for you. Also if you don't want to stand in line, you can use the self- check-out register as well.

The only thing that makes me feel bad is the fact that there are people who have no idea what Walmart is; people who have never expereienced the joy that comes from being able to get everything at one place. I feel sorry for these folks who have to travel to more that one place when they could go to a Super Walmart and find everything.

While in the beginning, I was somewhat irritated by the concept of having a Super Walmart so close, I have come to embrace it and like having it around.

Monday, March 22, 2004

Kids are cute...until you have one

Currently, my brother and his girlfriend are trying to make a baby. I love children,I really do, as long as I know that when they start to cry, I can turn and give them back to their parents. For some reason though, kids, especially small ones, love my brother to death. The problem is not so much the fact that he's doing everything to create another life...it's more the fact that my brother is refusing to see the reality of the whole situation.

First of all, my brother is 23 while his girlfriend al all of 17. Second, my brother has no job.Not only does he not have a job, he has no intention of getting one. Right now, his girlfriend is working part-time at the Space and Rocket Center. Surely, this one source of income can't be expected to support a child.

Another thing you have to realize is how much of a temper my brother has. Sure he can tolerate kids for a short amount of time, but once the kid starts misbehaving and not listening to my brother, he doesn't want to be bothered with it. It's like he's totally obilivous to the fact that a kid is not a toy; something you can pick up and play with when you want to and then just put on a shelf.

When you lump this with the fact that my brother also suffers from the occasional roving eyes and that he has no intention of ever moving out of my mom's house, these should be signs that something is wrong.

Evidently, these lovebirds haven't gotten this memo.

I just don't get it. Why is it that people who don't need to have kids are the ones that do while folks that would be great parents are unable to have kids. This is a very sad state of affairs. I'm not saying that my brother shouldn't have kids ever;he just shouldn't do it now. He shold wait until he's older and more financially stable instead of having a kid and then having to stuggle.

Is that so much to ask for?